THE TRAJECTORY OF LIFE.

From me to you;

Hey you, I hope you’re doing okay. You may presently not be where you want to in life, or have what you’ve always aspired to posses, but at least you have the greatest gift of them all. Life. Living through another day is no mean feat. In actuality, it’s a step worth celebrating, smiling about and being thankful for. Who knows, a lifetime of adventure lies ahead. One that will erupt a whirlwind of euphoria deep down within you. The kind that will ignite a dopamine rush of pure enthusiasm and desire, taking down all rational instincts honed over years of our evolutionary history. But before you walk down that road, immerse yourself placidly in the echoes of my counsel. Without reserve, and with boundless confidence let the eyes of your heart be opened up to what lies ahead, and to the present which may have a profound correlation to that future that awaits.

“…immerse yourself placidly in the echoes of my counsel.”

Firstly you are not broken. The wave of confusion and despair you sometimes feel in your inability to find purpose behind your existence, is what everyone around you feels. Embrace that feeling, for it will often visit you. It’s amazing how you relentlessly search for that magical ‘meaning of life’. Don’t quit nor become despondent. It is what makes you ‘you’, even if others tire or get agitated by that part of your soul. It’s also the reason why they are drawn to you in the first place.

But accept the fact that perhaps the only ‘meaning of life’ there is, can be found in the little things you tend to overlook.

Do not relinquish leading a healthy life. Working out, meditating, silent positive affirmations, prayer and eating healthy; all these are simple but powerful routines that boost your physical, psychological and emotional health. You may at times fail to subconsciously appreciate how valuable they are. Uphold them though, for these will help you keep a sane and clear mind in times of turbulence, making your quest in pursuit of that ‘meaning’ more worthwhile. Grow up, but never loose your child like outlook of life. It will help you find joy and laughter even in the darkest moments. Dance often, sing even if you’re off tune, write, play your heart out on the pitch and spend time in nature. These seemingly insignificant acts will be your greatest consolation when life threatens to get paralyzing.

“Grow up, but never loose your child like outlook of life".

Don’t set deadlines on things that have to unfold naturally, without you pushing or fighting.

Learn the difference between those aspects of your life you can and cannot control. Marriage by thirty is probably a fallacy. The thought of being in a relationship by then might turn out to be a mere illusion. Aspiring to be excessively wealthy at that age may be nothing short of a mirage. This neither means you’re unworthy of any of that, nor does it dictate that there isn’t an ounce of possibility to make it a realization. It just means that there is a time for everyone if they only master patience. The universe is like a twisting kaleidoscope that moves us all in turns. Relax, if fate and time have it, all these will fall in your favor.

“The universe is like a twisting kaleidoscope that moves us all in turns”

You cannot compel people to love you. If someone wants to leave, let them.

You will endure heartbreaks more often than you would wish for. Not necessarily in the context of romantic entanglements. It might also be in the course of your rapport with your acquaintances, when they let you down time and again. Learn to suffer in grace. With the wisdom of age and the perspective of years, you will realize that they were never meant for you. The only thing you will regret is the desperation with which you did not want to let them go. All in all portray kindness. However be modest enough to accept that your kindness might not always be instantly reciprocated. It will come to you though, eventually, at a time and from a source you least except. Appreciate the strangers and passersby who treat you well, sometimes coming into your life for the sole purpose of holding you through your most trying moments.

Learn to ask for help. You’re not weak for wanting to be held when pain suffocates and fear chokes.

Resign yourself to vulnerability, even if it means exposing to others the pain points that will hurt you most when poked. Over time you will learn to differentiate those who are worth being vulnerable with from those who aren’t. Never regret giving people your heart. It’s better to feel hurt than nothing at all. Don’t opt out of love because of your fear of grief. Don’t opt out of courage because of your fear of failure. Don’t opt out of belonging, because of your fear of disconnection. Despite your greatest efforts to contemplate why those you loved so deeply chose to hurt you the way that hurt most, you will never find the answers you’re so desperately seeking. And that’s okay. Let it go. Accept that sometimes the way others treat you reflects on them and their own inner demons and has nothing to do with you. Forgive them and walk away.

“..resign yourself to vulnerability..”

Despite your greatest efforts to be ‘good’, you will hurt people sometimes those who deserved it least.
Forgive yourself, for they will have forgiven you. Perhaps you were a lesson they had to learn in order to get what that they truly deserved. Be humble enough to apologize and strive to mend fractured relationships especially with those who genuinely care and love you.

Embrace that part of you that constantly pushes you to be better, and trust that all darkness eventually turns into light.

Learn to find solace in solitude when darkness creeps in. There will be a time when you will be forced to isolate in a one bedroom flat with your restless mind and two orchids as your sole companions. The ease with which you’ll endure it will reflect the extent to which you have learnt to love yourself. Don’t wait, start now. Discover your identity. Who you truly are, underneath all the social conventions and external frameworks defining you.
Knowing what you stand for, irrespective of other people’s views, will serve as your foundation when the world goes crumbling down.

Strive to better yourself, but never trade authenticity for approval. Accept that not everyone will like you. That’s okay too. There will be people who would die to have you in their lives. Take care of these, and keep them close.

Be more gentle to your parents. They have truly done their best, at every step of the way, to love you in the way their heart knew best how. They are only human, just like you.

I know it sometimes seems that you’re homeless, lost between different worlds with no place to belong. You’ll learn it’s not true. But it will take closed borders and cancelled flights to realize it. Cherish your home and the time you get to spend there with your aging parents and around your closely knitted siblings.
It’s good that you’ve resolved to work through your traumas too. However, accept that they may constitute a small part of you. Befriend them, but don’t let them define you. It’s entirely in your hands to shape and better yourself.

You can choose who you want to become. It’s never too late to start.

Never loose hope. You were never naive for dreaming big or having aspirations beyond your reach. Focus your energies entirely towards translating your ambitions into reality. Forge ahead, courageously but with a balance of optimism and realism, and that way you will unfold whatever it is the future has install for you.

Trust that you have all the resources you need to face anything that comes your way. No matter how broken you sometimes feel, you will pick you self up and stand straight. Just give it time.

There are instances when it will feel like the world has turned it’s back against you. Such times will push you to the limits and try to see what you’re made of. It is in such times when you will feel utterly overwhelmed, without a shoulder at your disposal to lean on. Do not be subjected to grief though. Trust your gut and know that you will make it through the fog and like an eagle you will soar high above the storms of life. Above everything, trust in God, whatever you conceive Him to be, making Him your anchor in the rough tides within the seas of life. With him all mountains are levelled and all complexities resolved.

“…trust in God, whatever you conceive Him to be…”

Beyond all the life’s pleasantries and afflictions, choose to be happy.

“…choose to be happy…”

You can have flaws, be anxious or burn with outrage but do not forget that your life is the greatest enterprise in the world. Only you can hinder it from flourishing. Many appreciate you, admire you and love you.

Remember that to be happy is not to have a sky devoid of a storm, a road in exception of accidents, work without fatigue or relationships free from disappointments. To be happy is to find strength in forgiveness, optimism in battles, security in the stage of fear and cultivation of love in discord. It is not only to enjoy the smile, but also to reflect on the sadness. It is not just celebrating the successes but also learning from the failure. It is not only to feel happy with applause, but to be contented in anonymity. Being happy is not a fatality of destiny, but an achievement for those who discover it within themselves. It is to quit feeling like a victim and resolving to become your destiny’s author. It is to travel through deserts, yet being able to find an oasis in the depths of your soul. It is to show gratitude. To thank God every morning for the miracle of life.

Being happy is not shying away from showcasing your innate feelings. It’s to be able to boldly talk about you. It is having the courage to hear a “no”, and accepting that your life doesn’t entirely depend on it. It is confidence in the face of criticism, even when unjustified. It is to kiss your loved ones, to pamper your parents, to live poetic moments with friends, even when they hurt us.

“To be happy is to live poetic moments with friends.”

To be happy is to let live the creature that lives in each of us, free, joyful and simple. It is to have maturity to admit “ I made mistakes”, the courage to say “ I am sorry”, the sensitivity to whisper “I love you”. It is to have the ability to say “I need you.”

May your life become a garden of opportunities for happiness. That in spring it may be a lover of joy. In the wintry seasons, one that cherishes wisdom. And when you make a mistake, start all over again. For only then will you be in love with life. Realizing that happiness never inclines to having a perfect life. In any case perfect is an illusion. Use your tears to irrigate tolerance, your losses to train patience and your mistakes to sculptor serenity. Your pains to plaster pleasure and your obstacles to open windows of intelligence. Never give up, never quit on those who truly love you. Never give up on happiness for life is an incredible show.

Ephy..